The Chart

Blog #5

The L Word. It took all of 5 minutes and I was hooked. Sucked in by these women and their …..I don’t know…everything!!! I loved everything about them. I wanted to either know them, be them, sleep with them, live next door to them and I sure as hell wanted to hang out at the Planet with them. I watched episode after episode, until I couldn’t keep my eyes open, and the second I woke up in the morning, I watched some more! All of the uncertainty I felt after sleeping with Daisy was shattered in one 50 min episode and the question now was….what was I going to do about it?? How was I going to get myself a piece of that life? And so, after I watched all of the 3 seasons that had aired at this point, I gathered as much courage as I could muster up and joined a short lived social networking system called “Our Chart”. Oh yeah, that’s right, I did it… and I’d do it again!!

For those of you reading that may have been living under a rock or were possibly trapped in some third world, Showtime-less country during that time, “Our Chart” was an L Word plot line turned actual lesbian networking site. On the show it was a way for Alice to show the connections between her circle of friends with any and all other lesbian circles that happened to exist. A social experiment if you will, a gay six degrees of Kevin Bacon. Type in someone’s name and see how many people it takes to connect you to that person.

In real life, though, it was an easy way to pick up chicks and I couldn’t sign up fast enough. This was my ticket in, this was a sure fire way to manifest my own circle of friends. It’s tough when you’re first starting out. You don’t anyone, you don’t know where to hang out, where to go to meet girls, find love, get laid. Especially if you aren’t a totally obvious dyke (or T.O.D as I like to refer to them). To the outside world I was perceived as an ordinary heterosexual female. There was nothing about me that screamed gay. No trendy short hair cut, no American Apparel unisex underwear, I didn't wear ties, and I certainly didn't drive a Subaru.

I had awkwardly browsed a few lesbian bars here and there but the reality was, I was way to shy to talk to anyone I found even remotely attractive. If I was going to do this, the internet was the perfect starting point!

So, the second that site was launched, I eagerly put together the most alluring yet non-desperate Chart profile I could. Man, I couldn’t wait for the babes to start rollin in and my new life to start. It was only a matter of time before I too was living in a financially unrealistic, West Hollywood craftsman with a hot sexually androgynous roommate. It was only matter of time before I was living next to my very own Bette and Tina. I couldn’t wait to meet up with all my friends who, oddly enough, seemed to take coffee breaks at the same time during the middle of the work day at our favorite café/night club. Yep, it was only a matter of time until I to was living the Weho lesbian dream. …….Or so I thought. This proved to be a little bit trickier than I had originally anticipated. I didn’t exactly hit the jackpot right away. There was no magical brand new lesbian life equipped with my favorite L Word character counterparts. There wasn’t a message inbox full of invitations from Marina or Alice look a likes, no Dana’s a knockin to be my new bff, and definitely no Shane McCutcheons to fall in love with even though I knew they would smash my heart into a million pieces. Nope, this whole chart idea I had was a good one but it wasn’t going to be an over night success. I did, however, at least manage to get a few cute girls to accept my friend request (whoo hoo) and one of them, much to my shear joy and relief, lead to an actual, bonafied, real live night out with a girl. SCORE!!!!

-Lesbian X